Return To Self

" I know what the world has done to my brother and how narrowly he has survived it. And I know, which is much worse, and this is the crime of which I accuse my country and countrymen, and for which neither I nor time nor history will ever forgive them, that they have destroyed and are destroying hundreds of thousands of lives and do not know it and do not want to know it."
~James Baldwin from The Fire Next Time

By: Angela Mayah Solstice

Hello! I am writing to you from a crisp and sunny day here in New York. I hope you are well. So much is going on around the world, during prayer last night my teenager asked a question we’ve all felt or heard at one point, “Why does God allow so much suffering to go on in the world?” My middle child piped in and replied, “God gives us choices.” It’s hard to convince an intellect like my daughter on these sort of philosophies, so I held my peace and let her sister have a go at it for awhile. Finally, I closed up the conversation and said this…

God created this world and gave us free will. He didn’t create it to have control over us or to micromanage it all. I believe that to stay connected to God and seek God was originally a normal and natural way of being—not forced in any way. Over time people and society matured into whatever they became, guided and lead by whatever Higher Power came to be in their life. Although the world can seem like a chaotic, scary and unfair place—I believe that those who continuously seek God will find the peace and answers they are looking for. I always end the prayer with asking God to speak to each of the children in a way they can understand.

Are you afraid by what you see going on in the world right now? Do you have more questions than answers? Do you sometimes just not see the point of life? If so, I understand. I’ve felt strong emotions in concern to these sorts of questions. I realized to try and figure out the whole world or attach myself to all it’s suffering, was going to stress me out more than anything. I found solace in disconnecting from the world when possible and simply seeking God for the answers to my life and my purpose. God has answers for you, the more you allow yourself to hear from God, the better you will feel. The more you have faith that whatever you hear is not meant to shame you or bring you down, you'll be able to receive better. Soon you will begin to trust God more and even yourself.

May we all have the courage to quiet ourselves and seek answers from God. May the words we hear, the pictures in our minds, and the people here to love us bring the motivation we need to live purposeful lives and stay grounded in our faith in God.❤️

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Searching For Truth

“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the ruler of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” 

Ephesians 6:12

By: Angela Mayah Solstice

Good Morning! I hope you are doing well. It is a beautiful day here in New York, summer seems to be holding on for a while longer and I'm not complaining!

Some intense energy has come into play these past few days. Some prophets declared this past Saturday as being the end of the world but we're all still here. I had one of my kids ask me late last week if Saturday would be the end, and I said no. She then asked, “But it will come one day right?”, and I said, “ Yup and God only knows when that time will be.” So, what do we do until then? A better question, why would God create something to end it one day? What's the purpose of having a world? I asked God this, not my typical sort of question, I'm usually busy with my personal business. So I thought to share the answer I received.

“Human potential is broadened or limited by its concept of God.”

~Na’im Akbar from Breaking The Psychological Chains of Slavery

As humans, we are created to withstand anything. We are durable, resilient, and steadfast. Sure there are such notions as trauma, depression, and sadness, but that is purely emotional and spiritual--all can be healed. God wanted our souls to have a chance to express itself in human form, with freedom of choice and will. Of course, over time, this created a lot of things--religion, money, rules, laws etc. I personally am not happy with it all, but my connection with God helps me to understand what's at play and brings me comfort. Meaning, God gives me the truth in whatever I would like to know, and I just accept it.

The biggest truths I've been uncovering is learning who I am as a Black woman, especially living in the United States. I've been reading a lot and this journey continues to deepen for me. I recently read a book called, Breaking The Psychological Chains of Slavery, a short but powerful read. It was recommended by the Pan African Alliance organization must-read books. I am currently making my way down the list.

Whoever and whenever it was said, the truth will set you free, I sure do believe it now more than ever. In our turbulent times, although I stand mentally in solidarity with many and their causes, I truly believe the answer to our plight is to search for truth. I know this may sound cliché or easy, but it is not. In fact, it is excruciating and liberating all at once. Or as my dearest ancestor Malcolm X used to say when traveling around teaching the lessons of the Honorable Elijah Muhammad, " God has given Mr. Muhammad some sharp truth. It is like a two-edged sword. It cuts into you. It causes you great pain, but if you can take the truth, it will cure you and save you …”

I encourage anyone, to follow and search for your truth. About your culture, your family, your history—especially the history of your country. Then internalize that truth, and stand by it. Every advancement that ever impacted our world, community, or families started with someone who came to know a deeper truth about life. Perhaps it will be you who ushers in the next change.

“It is faith that sustains us in the fear and loneliness of this lifelong search to help restore who we are.”

~Na’im Akbar from Breaking The Psychological Chains of Slavery

May God give us all the strength to live righteously and courageously. To not wander lost in the wilderness, but walk curiously and astute in the garden of our lifetime. I wish you peace, miracles, and as a good friend shared with me this week, the most benevolent outcome in all things.

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If God Is For You

"We know that people who are hurt will hurt others. As a healer we should not feed another ones pain with negative words or action. That does not mean stand there and be insulted, it means be creative in finding ways to deal with someone who is rude or hurtful...Don't let their negative energy hurt or effect you. Recognize what is going on and stay at peace."

~Rekhit Kajara Nia Yaa Nebthet from "Ra Sekhi, Kemetic Reiki"

By: Angela Mayah Solstice

Hello! I hope you are well! I am writing you today from a rainy afternoon in New York. Summer is officially coming to an end and it truly seems as if a new wave of energy has come upon us. I have been in much meditation and prayer riding this wave of powerful insights and reflection since the Solar Eclipse last week. This is not always easy. I constantly have to remind myself, just as soon as I become out of sorts, that God is in control. That I am on the path he has set before me and to continuously disconnect from any thought that would have me to believe otherwise. I am also reading an amazing book by Alice Walker, Now Is The Time To Open Your Heart. Although it is not categorized as an autobiography, I suspect the story is a pilgrimage Alice may have taken to South America to spend time with a Shaman. As always when I’m reading, the story told hit home for me in so many ways. From the grappling with the pain of our ancestors and finding ways to honor and process it all, to the many quips towards anti-feminist ideologies. Yet, the heart of the story is what the Shaman calls entering into the covenant with The Grandmother. It’s explained this way within the book, “And now, perhaps it was time to leave that area of exploration, to enter another: The life of the Virgin, one who is whole unto herself.”

I have been, or better yet I thought, I had already been to this place. I’ve spent several years in celibacy at one point, solely for the purpose of healing my womb and body. Although much healing came forth because of this, I find myself back to this place. Yet, without the need to put forth so much work, but to let God do his work on me. To surrender may be the most complicated thing one will continuously do being on the spiritual journey. To surrender to a plan, a life, and God that is bigger than your self may sound grand, but the actual unraveling and unlearning one must do to get there can be excruciating and exhilarating. If we are to walk entirely within our Divinity and not our ego, or not of other’s fears and projections towards us, it will take courage.

I had to check back in with myself. This past weekend I went back to re-read my own published books and many writings. One, to be sure if I still saw it fitting for others to take a read from its messages, and two, to see if any hypocrisies existed. So many changes have taken place in my life, I had to be reassured that my healing work I give to all of you is still God’s will and meaningful.  Yet most of all, I hope all of you who are reading this are finding hope in such a hopeless time. My prayer is that you find the leaders, teachers, healers, or even friends who are giving you the truth about who you are and about this world. A close friend of mine shared with me that she came across healers and teachers close to her new home in California over the weekend. It had been her prayer that she and her husband find their tribe in their new area, and they did. The tribe of people she found were stationed within a swap meet, teaching and giving Reiki sessions for free. I envisioned people communing and loving on each other within the welcoming atmosphere. I was so happy for my friend that her manifestation of needing to find her tribe happened so quickly.

My faith and happiness rest wholeheartedly in these kinds of stories. I know that what and whom we need in our lives are here, simply waiting for us to arrive. We are by nature and design, peaceful people. We are only angered by the injustices designed to oppress and abuse us or prevent us from achieving our life purpose. Staying in peace is God’s way of sheltering us from this world. To engage in energy outside of peace is to momentarily disconnect from the love God has for our lives. Do not be swayed; do not give in to a life of seemingly struggle and pain. If God is for us, who can be against us? Keep your peace, keep your faith, and follow the path before you!

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Dark Night of the Soul

“There are years that ask questions and years that answer.”

~Zora Neale Hurston

By: Angela Mayah Solstice

This time last year I was going through a rough time and being pressured from all corners of my life. Some call these experiences tests, but I don’t believe in that theory. The God of my understanding is not in the testing business because that would be a sort of manipulation. My God doesn’t manipulate me in that way. One theory did resonate with me though and that was I had gone through, A Dark Night of the Soul. Eckhart Tolle described this as, “An eruption into your life of a deep sense of meaninglessness.”

After years of miracles, signs, and contentment to suddenly be in a riptide of meaninglessness, cruelty, and darkness was incomprehensible to me. Fortunately, I didn’t curse God, but it sure gave me insight into how someone reaches that state of mind. Absolutely nothing made sense and it was a very scary time for me. This wasn’t part of my divine plan, it went against everything I had worked so hard to escape from, and here I was in the Devil’s Pit.

Brokenness is nothing to be ashamed of, we will undoubtedly find ourselves broken hearted from circumstances that were out of our control along our journey in life. An acceptance that bad things happen to good people, will afford you a whole lot peace in understanding the hard times you will go through. I often check in with myself by taking a look in the mirror to make sure the fire of my spirit is still burning in my eyes, and it is. What truly matters, has stayed in tact.

I have thought about my experience every which way. I looked for patterns, self-analyzed, prayed, and meditated. Using all the tools I knew of and it helped tremendously. I’ve stayed on track with my spiritual practice and in many ways, simply kept moving ahead. I’ve watched my perpetrators move on, seemingly unaffected, unaware, or simply not caring about the impact their choices had on my life, and I notice I'm not down and out by their selfishness. I take that as a good sign. Why should I be anything less than where God had me before going through the fire? As the church folks use to say, "If He brings you to it, He’ll bring you through it."

May you have the strength for your battles. May all of the faith, support, and resources needed for you to survive your trials come to you quickly and on time. May nothing come in-between your faith, your divine connection, and believing in yourself.

Keep moving forward!

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Book Review

The Magdalen Manuscript by: Tom Kenyon & Judi Sion

"You can't love someone enough to make them love you. If they can't love themselves, they surely can't love you."
~The Magdalen Manuscript

 I have finished a book that I knew beforehand would be life changing. When I say life changing I mean there are books where you will never be the same after reading because the confirmation of your most burning questions and knowings are solidified. This book is part of a direct channeled message from Mother Magdalen, mixed with other teachings and personal stories. Judy Sion along with her husband Tom Kenyon beautifully weave together ancient teachings, messages, and testimony about entering and/or preparing oneself for Sacred Relationship.

"I had been shown how I had walked a tightrope dangling above such a pit of darkness intent on destroying me that one tiny step to one side or another would have easily cost me my life."
~The Magdalen Manuscript

This book comes as a relief on a personal note to me because I just finished, what has seemed to be an eternity of lessons and learning in regards to soulmates, twin flames, and soul ties. The Magdalen Manuscript if you will, is an initiation into mature love. Love with purpose and understanding, between two willing and conscious adults aware of their mission in life. You must then be someone who understands this requires a huge amount of un-conditioning and un-learning of what you thought you knew about love and relationships. The book spends an incredible amount of time explaining the sacred tantric traditions. Clearly letting the reader know this wasn't about becoming knowledgeable on how to have good sex, but learning that sex was originally, and still is intended as a spiritual experience to be had.
 

"I have loved and desired from such a place of desperation that I have allowed someone to hurt me…"
~The Magdalen Manuscript

This read is not for the faint of heart, but for those well into their spiritual walk needing the extra push to know that we really are here for the evolution of our soul's purpose and nothing short of it. The pages are mystical and engaging and full of heart and soul. An honorable mention to the co-author Judi, whose candor and explicit sharing of her life story cut right to the core of myself, and many women who I know. A beautiful, wisdom filled book to say the least!

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Reiki Healing Sessions W/ Angela

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To Own Thine Self Be True

"Just your existence proves the existence of God. Your presence proves the existence of life and energy. We don't need to know or prove anything. Just to be, to take a risk and enjoy your life, is all that matters."

~Don Miguel Ruiz 

By: Angela Mayah Solstice

Good day! It is a beautiful Sunday here in New York and I thought to write to you all! Sunday has been known to many as a day of Sabbath or rest. Yet in still, we live in a world that keeps on pushing! Even going to or volunteering at a church takes a tremendous amount of energy. Are we ever, truly not working? Do our minds ever stop thinking? How on Earth is a day of rest realized?

 "Prosperity is Relaxation"

~Unknown

I knew of a restaurant in Chicago that closed from sundown on Friday to sundown on Saturday (I could be messing this information up, but as you will read on I was frustrated!) I remember being disappointed many times, because just when I had a taste for their delicious food and thought to walk over and order some food, it was closed! It became my pattern, I would think of their great food, I would go over, and it was closed. It sometimes felt like some cruel cosmic joke! If I had thought to spiritualize my experience of continuously going to the restaurant at the wrong time, I could have seen the signs. The owner offered a beautiful explanation for their peculiar hours, but I never took much time to look into it—I wanted what I wanted! How many times have we missed the mark on what may have been important to someone else, overly worried with our selfish desires? 

I believe that the majority of people are obsessed with time, money and sex. They want it instantly in the most self-serving sort of way. We have mistakenly been conditioned to think the more time invested in work, the more money, and the more sex. Which in turn equals more power and success. Although some may disagree, I still dare to say that sort of lifestyle must be tiring. Having sexual relations on the go, toying with people’s feelings and emotions, and constantly on the run is not going to give you much of a real foundation in life because you are moving to fast. I am not speaking about a foundation of jewelry, clothes, houses, and cars. I’m speaking about a foundation of self-love, authentic relationships, peace of mind, and spirituality.

"You teach people how to treat you."

~Dr. Phil 

I will share with you a story. I knew of someone who numerous times worked with the iconic Dr. Dre to complete musical albums for the record label he was running at the time. These projects, of course, had tight deadlines throughout the album making process. Yet it was a known fact, Dr. Dre did not work on the weekends so he could be with his wife and family. Countless times I overheard frustration in the voice of others who simply needed a quick question answered or worried about not making the deadline, but to my knowledge, Dr. Dre never budged despite the tremendous pressures from others. On the flip side, I heard an acknowledgment and respect for Dr. Dre having this ritual. To most of the young men, his discipline was some far out virtue they were incapable of carrying out when the truth was, they also had the power to create some boundaries and structure within their lives.

You do not have to be a multi-millionaire to set some standards in your life. In fact, if your goal is to be one, it might be a great tool to learn how too. You have the ability to disconnect from the rat race and fill yourself up with some good old fashion relaxation. The work will still be there, your friends will still love you, and the house won’t burn down. Your ability to tell others no, not right now or I’ll think about it, is an indication of someone loving or learning to love themselves. A person with the ability to clearly state what they need or want is a person with a good set of boundaries. There is a saying that goes, you teach people how to treat you. I have found this to be so true! When you begin to practice self-love, self-care, and implement boundaries, do you know you begin to attract sweet, loving people into your life?

May you find the courage, as the Bible reminds us, to let your yes be your yes, and your no be your no. May you learn to find the value in your time, your body, and all that you bring to this world. I pray for prosperity, love, and clarity to come to you always. 

Have an amazing week!

Angela

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